 | Handy Smurf tries out his new drill |
 | Papa Smurf playing with Smurfett |
 | Smurfett when the sun goes down |
 | Baker Smurf making that special stuffing |
 | Canie Smurf relaxing with a friend |
 | Brainy busy cutting up |
| Well, I would prefer my idea of cremation, and being mailed off in tiny
containers marked "FREE SAMPLE! REVOLUTIONARY NEW MEAT TENDERIZER!!!" to
everyone that I hate; barring that, I think the following might be a good
epitaph: I've got a chance to speak my last From under this old mound of grass; And so, before more time has passed Come on down and kiss my ass. | Ginny |
| "Now I'm fucked" | Frank van der Hulst |
| "He know's if Hell exists. Someday you will too" | David Hall |
| Here lies Grub Fuck'd one cat too many Now resides with Glub | Grub |
| No, that's also stupid. Actually I'll just let the family pick the inscription, and have it put on a two-foot erect marble penis, glossy pink with red veins. | St. Catheter |
| "Hey,Ted! Get your dick out of the dirt!" "Relax, Vommy, it's only my finger." | NurzRachet |
| "When you die, you're going to stink just like I did, you worthless fuck." | Wes Payne |
| "Well I thought it was funny" | Mike Kelly |
| Farewell, dear girls, my time has come I couldn't stay to laugh and flirt But rest assured I'm watching you: Down your blouse or up your skirt | docfarquar |
| - "Nothing better to do ?"
- "Your turn soon" - "I hope you don't get killed on the way back home" - "Bob, I fucked your wife Joe, I fucked your mam, Al, I fucked your sister, Phil, I fucked your daughter" - "Damn, why did I even fucking bother with life ?" - "Kids, mam and I were never legally married, the money's going to a crack whore and her 'tard kid" | Skozz |
| "Wish you were here" | Rev. Syd Midnight |
| Here I lie, stinking up my grave Glad that I died in someone else's cave And now you can't find me And it's really just as well Since I never really liked you Now just enjoy the smell. | Crato |
| Im thinking something shaped like large erect penis (circumcised) with the
text: " Im in Hell skull-fucking your mother " | steven |
| 'Press here for smell tube' | Lots42 |
| Wish You Were Here. | Alraune |
| "Get the Fuck Off My Lawn." | Emasculator |
| "Here lies Eggplant, buried beneath the soil... Don't leave flowers, just horseshit... He's hopin' to be resurrected...." | Egg Plant |
| Bang did he live Bang did he die He will be missed by the subscription department of the New York Times | Bill |
| "piss on my grave cunt, I would've pissed on yours" | Herry |
| another idea. you have a computer built into the coffin, with a flat screen
inside an inch-thick transparent plastic shield in place of a headstone. the
pc generates an image of a body still alive inside the coffin, clawing at
the camera as if trying to get out. | nikolai |
| ....a sensor by the grave, and a little
speaker buried just under the surface
of the dirt...
Any time someone walks near it, the
scratching noises and desperate shrieks
start coming from (seemingly) the grave
or coffin itself, scaring the living
bejeepers out of the poor goth-wannabe
who's wandering around in the graveyard... | acelightning |
| "As the fungi feed on my nipples and the maggots infest my rear. My thoughts are only of you and I wish that you were here." Okay, it needs work. I'm not dead yet. | Eddie Coroner Whore |
| "Here lies Mr. Roper, star of Raped by an Angel." or "Dead, looking up your dress, and loving it." or "Just another person who demanded to get cremated and didn't." or "Hey You! Yes, you badass satanist! I DARE you to eat my brain." or "Get me out of here, this cemetary is haunted!" or "I regret nothing!!!!!!!" Can't decide, if I really had my way I'd be buried beneath a landmine. | Roper |
| I might even get a gravestone with a facsimile of my arse on it (on credit, if I can) with the inscription "Creditors... kiss here". | Frank. |
| ObMyEpitaph: "I told you I was sick." | Vomit |